Monday, September 21, 2009

Marriage and Money

Where marriage exists, so do money problems. People cannot exist on this planet without some kind of commerce. We all have bills. We all pay bills. We all have desires and we all take steps to meet at least some of those desires. So then there will arise some conflict between the wants and desires of the partners and the needs of the partners regarding finances.

There are a number of ways of handling this conflict. Some tried and true ways include being completely open and honest with your spouse regarding where the money is concerned, and building a budget. This means that yes you will have to let them know if you spent money that wasn’t planned. It also means that you will be accountable for your actions. This is a responsibility that should be welcomed.

Not everyone arrives at a marriage with experience or knowledge for making a budget. A budget does not need to be extremely complex, it merely needs to include where the money is coming from and where it is going. But more important than that, the budget needs to be ratified and fully accepted by all included parties.

If one of you doesn’t agree to what is written on the paper (or saved on the computer) then it is completely worthless. There has been no communication. There has been no progress. This hearkens back to the first requirement which is full and open communication about the money. Where is the division of responsibilities? Where is it going?